It’s summer, and naturally I have vacation on my mind. But where do I really want to go? What does it take to have a perfect vacation? It’s something very simple, and yet so difficult to achieve.
Being a trans person, I am judged every day. There are the side-eyes, the stares, the whispers, the misgendering, the intentional rudeness, and sometimes even people yelling at me. I am used to this. Every day. And even though I’ve gotten much better at not trying to guess what people think, even though I push it down, pretend not to notice, the constant grind wears on me.
So, it might not be too much of a surprise that for me, the perfect vacation is not necessarily tied to sunny weather, deep blue ocean, and sandy beaches. Instead, a perfect vacation is one, where I can rest my mind. A moment during which the world just lets me take a break and allows me to simply be myself. But where could this possibly be?
I just came back from a two-week road trip through Scandinavia. I guess there is a reason why these people rank among the happiest in the world. One can feel that they are free of existential threats, which allows them to live a calmer, less stressful life. A life with much less need to blame someone else for their own misery.
My 2,200-mile trip brought me through Copenhagen, Gothenburg, Oslo, Stockholm and Malmo. I’ve interacted with countless people in hotels, restaurants, museums, sightseeing buses, and on the street. And throughout this whole time, I experienced those looks and whispers exactly once – coming from a German family.
The remainder of the time, I could just be myself. Think much less about what opinion others might have of me. Use little or no makeup. Speak without hesitation. Laugh. Relax.
Why can’t every day be just like that?
Heartfelt hugs, Liz